Thursday, August 26, 2004

Symphony at Odyssey

Now folks! I pamper myself. I seriously let myself have a good time even when I dont need one. Such things stem from the opinion that I do a lot of hardwork by just waking up and living everyday. Left to myself I won't go to work, won't bath, won't even brush my teeth. If I start out to go to work in the nude.. then the whole world will follow my example ( not me ..just my example). I could start a nude revolution in no time! snap.. and there you have it gzillion naked workers. The reason I dont do all this because I wanna keep the society sane. 90% of the things everybody does, they seem to do so because everybody else does it. The society demands that I do stuff, which left to myself , I would discard them because they are too much of an overhead-maintainence just to get through to the next day! But I still do them.. its for the general good of the society. So, I brainwash myself that I am integral cog in giant wheels of the society. . My whole life is a sacrifice! I deserve to pamper myself.

( ya! i am reading too much calvin and hobbes :-) and getting delusions of spaceman spiff! )

All this is a prelude to my trip to the haircut salone/saloon/parlour. Before I go to the haircut place, I think all the above and decide to reward myself. Kumar is the dude. He works in a place called Odyssey. Odessey is the salone/saloon/parlour which apart from doing a haircut does so many other things to people. Most married men visit this place because it fills the gap in their married life. This shop is sort of the next best thing to marriage. Nobody gets the perfect wife because 20% of the pages in a "perfect wife" rule book requires her to be a barber/masseus. It's the 20% gap where no woman has gone before.

But I digress.. ( which is okay since i also am taking requests :-) )

I am regular at that place and probably the only guy who orders the kitchen sinc every single time. Kumar knows my haircut preferences and the order of my orders. The man is an artiste. His work is divine, the sound of his scissors is pure music. He tut-tut's and ahm-hem's most of my weird requests and gets to work like an a possesed man.

If the haircut is divine wait till you experience the new "seedhakalpegya legiyam" Herbal Head Massage. Its 20 minutes of pure dlight. The side of the head is first put through a strenous pounding and then there is that raising movement from the ear to the center and then that both-hands-locked-and-tap-head routine. The finale has a electronic massager that really puts you to sleep. For folks who havent experienced a massage, there is a face massage, body massage. wow!

Chorus: now most of the guys would be thinking.. man.. "can I get this @ home"... "can they train my wife". Not so easy.. my dear sirs! .. not so easy! but its possible !!! gotta work at it!

(end of chorus)

I tried out 2 new things called pedicure(care?) and manicure!?. It came highly recommended. never done this before. And it was awesome. No shame fellas. If you havent got one.. just get one! There is a person who cuts your nail, does something to make sure all nails are left/right/center justified ( MS word stuff). Cleans the gaps between the leg finger. He managed to cut my pinky toe nails. Then the insides of the legs are cleaned. Whoa! Then there is a leg massage (they have invented a machine which massages legs.. can u believe that). And the "sodaak!!..sodaak!" of the leg fingers ( you know the pull-and-fingers-make-a-sound routine).!!!! its sexyyy!

(repeat chorus)
(repeat chorus)

Then he "sodaak-sodaak"'ed my hand fingers, shoulders, neck!. Made sure I was comfortable. You know how much the head massage costs ..just 50 bucks! the whole thing cost me less than 500 Rs. Damn cheap.. in uncle sam's land you gotta need country club membership to do this!
Walking out! I felt like a new person. I was ready to make all the sacrifices for the society. Superman has returned to save the world from the Lex Luthors!

Wouldnt it be a wonderful world if someone could do this to us everyday (atleast weekly!!!!)

(repeat chorus)
(repeat chorus)

P.S: As a sidenote, I was wondering how these hair-cut folks seems to generally enjoy thier lives. Its a tough job, cutting other people's hair washing their feet etc. Its good that people feel the need to let other people work on their hair fingers, leg etc.. it generates employment for folks who otherwise would be on the streets begging. But having said that, the people in the shop seemed to be generaly happy, cracking office-humor kinda jokes etc. Their happiness and enthisiasm was refreshing. How much would they earn a few..lousy bucks a day! but they have spirit. And thats a lot!