Thursday, March 17, 2005

Moral Policing

A decade or so ago ( and I can't believe it has been that long ), when I was finishing up on high school and standing in line for the engineering college admissions, I just had one clear thought in mind - I needed to have fun in college. Not that I had a nerdy-geeky school life. It was normal by any standards. But schools in general have stupid restrictions. For example you are stuck inside the school buildings from 8:30 AM until 4:00 in the evening. When you are in high school, the teachers usually devised N thousand ways to make you behave well. Some students receive threats that if they behaved badly then they may never get hall tickets, which are required while entering the examination hall to write the final exams.

Ofcourse nearly all students knew that the internal valuation which counted for 25% of the score in the three science exams was directly propotional to the students personal relationship with the teacher. This system or theory is still valid now in any part of India. This bugs me so much. Someone has to stand up for this injustice and stop it. In my opinion, a fair system should clearly allow a student to disagree strongly with his teacher and still be graded only on his performance in the exams. Why? because the 100 or 200 points for which the student is graded does not factor in his relationship with his teacher. There are 20-30 questions that appear in the theory and practical question papers. Each question carries its own weightage. The sum total of the weightage of all questions is the 100 or 200 points. Now if there was a section which specifcally asked the grader to evaluate the students relationship with his teachers then the grader ( who invariably is the teacher) can deduct ( or add, which is rarely the case) points. Otherwise the grader should only be interested if the student had answered the question asked. Period. This logic is so simple and plain that it does not need any special explaining.

But, that is not the case. The teachers and school administration do the following to keep students under leash.

1)Academically weak students: Threaten them that they won't be given hall tickets. So students who have studied 2 years in high school are not guranteed a spot in the examination hall. This I feel a school normally does to protect it 100% pass statistics. If a school has been claiming that 100% of its students pass the common examinations, it only means it has been denying weaker students a spot in the exam hall at the last minute. My take on this is - unfair. If a student after 2 years in that school still sucks. Then the school is incompetent. If the school feels the student is a born-moron and cant study to save his life, it should not have admitted him in the first place ( so its the school's mistake). Admitting students based on the money they can donate makes the student pool look like drawing cards in a casino. Plus the school had two years to deal with the student if they can't get him to pass (seriously! merely passing a public exam is not that tough) the exams they they don't deserve a 100% pass claim in the newspapers.

2)Students who are academically sound but are sports or cultural enthusiasts - Normally these students were reputed to freak out with the opposite sex or have a primadonna image in high school. Boys who fell under this category weren't liked by the teachers. Girls who were in this category were almost treated like prostitutes. No kidding! This is true. I have seen and still see many academically sound girls suffer as a result of this. If you are a good looking chic and your name starts doing the rumor rounds linking you with some boy, inside or outside of the school -- you have a really tough time ahead. These students are tamed in a different way. The 50 points for the practical exams are used as the blackmail tool to make these people "behave". Students who had the balls to disagree with the teachers on this practice ( or any of their other stupid practices) were also tamed the same way. If I had anything to do with school administration, I would look at dismissing these teachers on the spot. What they are doing is wrong. On the question of "how to find if a salt is lead nitrate in 2 steps", they have no right to deduct points because the student was rumored to have had an affair with a person in his/her after-school tuition class. It is simpy illogical.

Items #1 and #2 usually intersected in a big way. I am not claiming that school kids are saints in uniforms. They may not be. But this is not the solution to deal with them. This really affects fringe people like me. Until VIIIth grade or so, I was the kid who belived in fighting for causes. Sometime in IVth grade which my mom and aunt still remember with great fear, I created a record in P.S Senior Secondary school, Mylapore by securing 23 blackmarks ( there was a blackmark chart in each class and students was given a blacknmark if he did not behave well. 10 blackmarks - u had to stand out of class a whole day; 20 - a visit to principals room; and 30 - u are out of the school). A big bully ( name arvindh) was tearing my anaemic, thin, fragile friend ( i think his name was srikanth) to pieces during a class break and when I stopped him, he made fun of my glasses (in some distant past, I used to wear glasses ) and threw them to some corner of the class. When the teacher came in I was standing on arvindh's face .. and jumping ..with the whole class baying for his blood. It was my moment of childhood glory. I got a record 10 straight blackmarks in a single shot. Nobody had ever got so much for a single offense before ( Later, I had high school students seeking me out and asking me the reason). From then on I earned a blackmark even if I sneezed, 5 blackmarks if I farted. Srikanth got none from that incident and arvindh 8. So the bottom line was I'd get my behind in trouble standing up for some stupid thing and then watch other students slither away ever so silently. Ya! its true some people just had a knack of disappearing and becoming part of the background and some people had the knack of stepping out of the bathroom and walk into the spotlight - naked.

So, I learned to keep my ass shut the hard way. But still, tolerating this perversion in high school was a big thing for me. What made things even worse for me was to put up with the "Lick Ass" clan. This system of student threatening has led to the "Lick Ass" group of students. They lick the teacher's ass at the drop of the hat. These are average students whom you could outwit outbeat out-excel hands down in a theory subject but in turn they would beat you by N Thousand light years in Practical subject, where internal evaluation counts for a lot. Its because they ran behind the teachers continuously. Got them chalk pieces, gave them "Happy Teachers Day" Bouquets. When a question was asked in class, they repeated the right answer loudly to the teacher, milliseconds AFTER the brightest boy in class had spelled out the answer. Volunteered to borrow a textbook from the next class whenever the teacher wanted it. They wouldn't give you a pencil if you wanted to borrow one in the last minute, whereas we would sharpen a pencil both sides, break it into 2 just to share it with a friend. These were the gang of students whom I hated passionately. I blame the 2 items I listed above for the rise of such students. Why? because if there is a system in place for teachers to give students an unfair disadvantage over other students, then the same system can be used ( as opposed to misused because you really cant miuse whats already being misused) to gain an unfair advantage over other students. So this gang figured that if you can do the lick ass and improve your score why not? Of course the public exams, which was ( and still is) graded by neutral people ( and the answer papers were anonymous with no identity linked to it - thanks to the system of dummy numbers and blind correction) levelled these dorks to the ground.

hmm... I actually started out to write something about college ...but look how much I have digressed.. I will make this is a 2 post double-bill and continue about college in my next post.


Anonymous said...

I exactly know what you are talking about and I fully agree with you on how these students that are good in acads and sports/culs are treated. Though, I was never involved much in culs/sports, I personally know ppl (esp. those that belong to the fairer sex) who were decent enough at both acads+culs/sports and got the "reward" for the same. As I was reading your post, the one name that sparked in my mind was that of a certain "SS" in X std. I'm sure you know the "SS" in X std :-). It's not that easy to forget her...:-) Let me know if you are not able to identify her..I'll give ya' more hints:-)
I still very clearly remember how she was admonished in front of the whole darn class by our "Class Teacher" for her involvement in Sports on Sports Day. What an irony...
I guess the reason why most of these teachers do not encourage this is probably coz they hate the idea that these students become very famous and "sought-after" in school. Proabably, bcos they were never famous during their youth or the thought they may never experience the "sough-after" feeling in their life. I guess the reasoning is pretty much the same as why many girls do not like Aishwarya Rai...:-)...the worst part is these girls dont even like guys that like Ash.
About, getting caught with teachers at the wrong time...tell me about it...I still wonder why these teachers show up in class only when exactly I'm about to punch the other guy in the face..ofcourse...for a fight that he would have started for all the wrong reasons. Thank God...we didn't have a blackmark system...
I've seen a lot of "Lick ass" goin on in college for that revered "Reco" letter. The worst part is that it starts right from the first year, for puposes of "Relationship building", for the letter that they will be getting at the end of final year. But, I think this reason (Reco letter) is much better than the stupid practical marks in some school half-yearly/final exams which doesn't matter for anything much.

Anonymous said...

Hey Bharath,
Don't you think to an large extent this also reflects what happens in life afterwards. Even in work, people who talk,impress somehow get more popular than people who actually do the work!

Suresh Ramani said...

Well, you are right, in my opinion, anything less than 70% marks from 100% of the students is a faliure in teaching and in education. Sadly, it is not viewed that way by the teachers.

I do believe that schools should be the place (apart from home) to teach the kids discipline, morality, etc. - but, the problem is that the teachers tend to lean on their ego and personal sense of values in implementing it resulting in the sort of situations you have mentioned.


Hawkeye said...


//* Don't you think to an large extent this also reflects what happens in life afterwards. Even in work, people who talk,impress somehow get more popular than people who actually do the work!

suresh unknowingly answered ur question b4 I wanted to.

//* the problem is that the teachers tend to lean on their ego and personal sense of values in implementing it resulting in the sort of situations you have mentioned.



The problem is if you evaluate everything by pure logic things should work fine like a connection of NOT XOR and NAND gates. The o/p should be what the boolean equation says. But then emotions, ego and personal values makes things so complicated that "talkers" are able to slip through the cracks and "doers" are left thinking the world is unfair or even worse start to blame ( and thereby believe in) "luck".

Hawkeye said...


I need that hint :-) is it San. Selv. ?

//* Proabably, bcos they were never famous during their youth or the thought they may never experience the "sough-after" feeling in their life. *//

true this is where massaging personal eo comes into play.. which is why this is the best strategy for lick ass clan to get those brownie points.

//* I guess the reasoning is pretty much the same as why many girls do not like Aishwarya Rai...:-)...the worst part is these girls dont even like guys that like Ash. *//

cant agree with you more. Ash is so good looking. It is definetly not superficial. It is specifically for the purpose of avoiding the " you are superficial and shallow" comments - I wanted to get a li'l "deep" :-) into Ash but she didn't want to...

hey wait a minute.. What am I saying.. I am married !!! oh my gawd.. ruuunnn!! :-)

Anonymous said...

You got it buddy. It's ofcourse San Selv. a.k.a in school as "Nadamaadum p** pannai" Now, don't ask me for anymore hints on what this means :-)
Though I didn't get a chance to "dig deep" (Salman Khan SOB:-))in Ash YET, I did get a chance to meet and talk with her face-to-face. Oh Boy OH BOY...What a face...The last time I remember being so stunned was when I saw the Eiffel and the Taj. I did manage to get a few pictures with her and ofcourse the autograph. Truly...What an act of God she is. Those eyes...I dont think those should be donated after her End [Note "End" and not "Death" coz i think she's eternal:-)]. The best part about meeting her is that nowadays when I see an Ash movie...when others just admire her on-screen presence you know what I'm thinking about...:-)

Anonymous said...

It could defitintely be the reason why lotsa girls dont like Ash..but it doesnt make Ash non-superficial.

But for looks, there is nothing else in her. Iam surprised that she survived as an actress for so long..which shows that most of us are alright with superficial things as long as they come in a good package.

And she talking about indian culture and all the goof up in david latterman show was utter crap

Anonymous said...

I dont know what else you are looking for when you say "But for looks, there is nothing else in her". What else do you need. If you are looking for THAT something else (whatever it is) in Ash, feel free to look out for that in other actresses or in yourself...sure enough those girls (including yourself:-)) dont have what Ash has. Does that mean, you can be blamed for the lack of it. BTW, there is no written rule that says Ash is supposed to have EVERYTHING that makes everyone happy. and Ash herself has never proclaimed that she's the best actress to grace planet earth. I'm actually surprised that "you are surprised that she survived as an actress for so long". Common sense will tell you that today's average movie-going audience lead a very busy and packed life. They are just looking for a "refreshing" 3 hours, which is what Ash offers... and hence her success and you really cannot blame the audience for what they want and definetely cannot blame Ash for offering what the majority of her audience wants. The last thing that most of them wanna do when they watch a movie is to look for amazing acting abilities. Are you telling me girls watch Hrithik Roshan/Salman khan movies for their acting abilities...Bullshit....Tell me how many actors are there in today's industry that are without a decent physique...this explains the increasing numbers of model turning in to actors...john abraham, Dino Moreo etc.. I've never heard anyone complain about the acting abilities of these guys....then why the hell should Ash and other good looking actresses take the heat (though I believe Ash does a decent job at acting and has definetely improved over the years). I've never heard of a guy who complains that these model-turned-actors dont how how to act. Looks like today's male is more forthcoming in accepting a woman's taste when it comes to movie-watching than vice-versa.
Moreover, I can't even think of any actress that is still acting and has any of those "non-superficial qualities".

Put simply, Ash has simply used her god-given natural gifts to achieve personal success. This is in no way different than how many Indians/Others have used theirs to achieve success. To blame her for this is totally unfair. Last but not the least, in letterman's show, she just responded in the right way for Dave's immature and uncalled comments on the fact that many Indians live with their parents even after growing-up. But for that, she was just responding for his queries. Atleast, ASH HAD WHAT IT TAKES to get invited in one of America's top late night shows...and ofcourse you did not have IT to be there. To be the first Indian citizen to be on such a show...speaks volumes about her..irrespective of what others might think.
Let me just end by saying this...there are lot'ta ppl in this world who are upset/jealous/whatever at ppl that are successful and always taking a shot at these folks in terms of what it is that these folks are doing wrong. This is even true for many employees in companies that are pissed off at VP's/SVP's just bcos they make a lotta of money. I my opinion, thoughts & attitudes like these are not going to help anyone let alone the person who's feeling so. I always feel that one has to observe whatever it is that made these ppl successful and see if we can incorporate those things in our lives as mush as possible.

Anonymous said...

LOL..What are you ..her PRO/ Spokesperson ?

I just meant that she cant act and she cant dance and she is better off being a model.

I really dont care about hindi movies coz most of the movies suck!(other than Aamir khan's) I would watch ASH's posters in indiafm(dot)com instead of going through the pain of watching her act. Ash's acting is like sourav ganguly's leg side play..If you cant improve it in 8-9 yrs..You really suck!

>I always feel that one has to >observe whatever it is that made >these ppl successful and see if we >can incorporate those things in our >lives as mush as possible.

She is what she is only because of how she looks. You cant find a quality in her that could make a difference in your life..(Please dont paste links of articles about her work for WHO/UNICEF, that is a part of the Miss Universe contract)

>.then why the hell should Ash and >other good looking actresses take >the heat

Quoting from Alaipayudhey.."Logic Sagikkalai":)

My point is..Dont idolize someone just by the virtue of their looks. Say she is beautiful, picture perfect etc..No questions asked, I agree..There ends the story. Why give them a lot of consideration just coz they look good.( and this case for the sake of the argument, they are of the opp. sex). And why do we just prefer not to talk about the -ve side!

Geeesh, Sorry if I had hurt your feelings!

Anonymous said...

I really dont give a shit about whether you hurt my feelings simply coz u can't. and you dont have to be someone's PRO/spokesman to say something good about someone.
Quoting from Alaipayudhey... Your "Logic Sagikkalai":)

>I just meant that she cant act and she cant dance and she is better off being a model.

If this is the yardstick for being an actress then there hardly would be any actresses today in hindi movies...

>>I really dont care about hindi movies (other than Aamir khan's)

Thank god...good for hindi movies..though i feel pity for Aamir khan...

Now..u want me to believe that you like Aamir khan's movies for his acting (if he has any)and nothing else..Nice about setting different standards...

>>I would watch ASH's posters in indiafm(dot)com instead of going through the pain of watching her act.

You sound like you have an open invitation from the Oscar committee for judging ppl's performances in thankful that you are atleast able to watch the Oscars on TV. and definetley, Ash/ other fans are not losing anything by u not watching her movies. and it's more pain for me to respond to ur illogical arguments than it is for u to watch her movies.

Ash's acting is like sourav ganguly's leg side play..If you cant improve it in 8-9 yrs..You really suck!

Look who's talking about's utter ignorance to even compare acting with cricket simply coz the objectives of these two things are totally different. In cricket you are expected to win matches and moreover you are representing the country (so u better be the best) and your individual performance or lack of it WILL have a significant impact on the team's outcome. whereas in acting...though it's a team work a movie can be made successful even if individual's fail..if other factors like music, direction is good. I dont think many directors/producers cast Ash in their movies for her acting. She just has the ability to attract crowd to the theatres and which is all that is required for a movie's success. Like I said before...she is just as good in acting as most of her contemporaries in the industry which is all that si required. So, comparing sourav with ash is absolute nonsense.

>>>.then why the hell should Ash and >other good looking actresses take >the heat

all i was saying is that ppl dont expect great performances from these model-turned male actors but why is that only Ash who is from the same background is compared to a different yardstick...just bcos she's been more successful than others. hope u can atleast understand something as simple as this.

>She is what she is only because of how she looks. You cant find a quality in her that could make a difference in your life..(Please dont paste links of articles about her work for WHO/UNICEF, that is a part of the Miss Universe contract)

There are so many good looking women in the world and many are even better looking than her and not every good looking girl is a successful actress... good looks alone wont win you a Miss World title...btw...she won the Miss World title...get you facts right first before bad-mouthing.

I never said that I idolize her. I'm just sick and tired of ppl(with not so good looks) accusing her of her looks and saying that whatever she has achieved is coz of her looks. I dont see anything wrong with that. Doesn't Shaq O'Neal have an undue advantage over others coz of his size..can he be blamed for dont even frick'in tell me that I'm Shaq's PRO...that logic of urs really SUCKS bigtime !!!

I'm not giving her a lot of consideration coz she's of opp. sex. I'm just giving her due credit. I would probably do the same thing if the person in questions is a male. Another thing that I dont understand is why is it there is always a stigma associated with admiring someone for their looks...why cant it be just the same as admiring anything else that is beautiful in the world...and it's almost always assumed that someone with good looks do not have anything "substantial" to offer which doesn't make any sense.

>>And why do we just prefer not to talk about the -ve side!

why is that we always prefer to focus on negative aspects of ppl that are rich and famous and good looking in this case...

Anonymous said...

Ha ha..Man you are steaming out through every possible opening !

When 2 people disagree about something and try to argue, it should always be A's argument vs B's argument. You could have been beeped out atleast 10 times for taking the argument to a personal level. You are trying to make a point here and So am I. You lose your objective , when you try to analyse me on a personal basis rather than search for a logic begind my argument and bring a counter argument. Espescially when both of are wrinting anonymously.

Anyways no point talking about this further !!

Hawkeye said...

I remember in good old movies 2 brothers ( twins) who look exactly the same are fighting with each other. The heroine or a 3rd person has a gun in hand and is looking to shoot the evil twin.

The things is he cant differentiate between the two and those two are tumbling and when this gun fellow tries to make a shot they roll over and who appears to be the good guy shows his back to him.. here.. two anonymous people are fighting and the thing is I lost track of who is saying what.. I am like seeing here and there..with my gun ( and love for Ash)

one thing is sure.. there is A who is supporting Ash for her good looks and says that is enough. there is B who wants more than good looks. There may be a C and D over here but I am really not sure..

The thing is A thinks B is a girl, which I am really not sure. I think thats a big assumption to make. Since A's whole argument has been built upon that .. its in a bit of a risk of crumbling down if B turns out to be a guy ( even if B is a girl A's argument is too dependent on gender).

Anyway... although I am not sure if I am addressing 2 or 4 people out here ( although there is a 1% chance that somebody is playing a practical joke by posting as 2 different anonymous people).. I will stick my neck out and say this.

From personal experience ...from my mom , next door neighbor, aunt, cousin wife.. People have shouted at me for drooling over Ash for just 1 reason. They thought I was superficial.

I think that is the major reason ( because I have seen some stunning looking girls dislike Ash-Drooling too). So its really not so much of jelousy as it is of the judgement formed on droolers in genereal and Ash-droolers in specific.

My point is if you can appreciate inner beauty and can revel in a person's conversational ability, personality etc than a you can also revel in a person's external beauty. Liking someone because they are staggeringly beautiful is not wrong. That beauty is part of that person and belongs to that person. Infact that is what is immediately visible. It is as important as the inner beauty. Both are important and ideaklly a combination of both is preferable. However, choosing one of the other is a personal perogative and a judgement ( superficiality or lack of personal beauty) should not be formed based on such a choice.

To answer the question as to why men go after Ash. Think about reflex. When a doctor checks ur reflex he take a soft hammer and knocks ur knee and he sees a reflex. Can you explain that? no its biology ( or some combination of chemistry and biology --- the phsyics and "mechanics of motion" come much later :-) ). So literally men give out a knee jerk reaction on seeing Ash.

What we now see of Ash is just her good looks ( in abundance I should say). We have no way to measure how she is as a person. She may really be a nice profound person ( after all she has travelled a lot, met people and has handled the kind of pressure which we cannot imagine in this life time)

As to her acting abilities, I have less knowledge about that as I have only seen 2 of her movies. But I can say that she can't act. That is certainly true. But since men dont wanna see her act but just wanna drool.. it seems to work out allright. The power of this "knee jerk" reaction is so much that inspite of giving 98% flop movies Ash still continues to dominate the industry.

On the technicalities of "argument strategies" among commenters and bloggers. yes personal comments should be certainly avoided. It makes the logic of the argument too specific and so less viable in a generic sense. Moreover, we are just having fun here. So people must encourage someone hwo has a different opinion than discourage or critisize. It maks arguing and living worthwhile.

Anonymous said...

Hey ,

This is Anonymous again:) The knee jerkness is just a weakness that all of us have. No exceptions at all. A weakness that the entire population has , doesnt become a strength/ positive point. It still remains a weakness. I might be one among the droollers(millions and millions), but it doesnt make me right.Sad but true, numbers on each cant decide on whats right and whats wroing.

When Leander paes is a very good tennis player, All that we know about him and should appreciate about him is his Tennis skills. Cant give him a golf club and make him play , and say that he does an excellent job with that. In this case, if he sucks people will say he sucks. But we just have the habit of discounting the mistakes that people with good looks do.
Again my point is Ash is stunning and beautiful et all. But your analysis on her ends there, There is nothing much in her. Thats the case with any actres, including ASH. My point is not agains ASH as a person, my point is against people like ASH.

I am not trying to paint holy picture here, I probably fall under the "majority" number too . But its just a point that I wanted ro raise!

Hawkeye said...

//* I did manage to get a few pictures with her and ofcourse the autograph *//

Wanted to say this b4...

did u shake hands with her..

So the hand that touched Ash as inturn typed stuff that appeared as comments in my blog which in turn was read by me. I already feel blessed. I can feel the connection to Ash already :-) :-)

On the Melody-Choclatey argument:

I thought of something else too, Unfortunately Cine actors are questioned by the media on a lot of things which they are not qualified to talk about. You see these skimpy dressed girls talking about in general etc..

Not to demean these girls they may have their own perspective..But if I muted the TV it wouldn't make a difference..

the important thing is I should know that the Lady is appearing on TV because of her good looks. As long as I know that I am not deluding myself about her capabilities in other areas. For her personal development... If she can leverage from that point onwards to show some of her other talents like singing mimicry etc then good for her..

But When Ash was answering to David Litterma's question on Indian lifestyle etc.. I certainly did not think she was an expert on Indian culture or was brought on stage to use her expertise and address the Indian culture issue.

from a marketing stand point ..Her face is her USP. To blatantly say that .. would be indignified.. She has to make sure she as some sort of a personality going for her to make her look dignified. Thats it.

I think Both the anonymous are correct but didnt get each others point. The 2nd Anonymous ( the one who is not my school frnd and the one who unfortunately has not seen San Selv) most recent comment cleared the air up.. Well although the blogged topic was vastly different.. it at least gave me a chance to talk about Ash anyway. So good!

Anonymous said...

Leander not being able to do a good job at golf as in tennis is not his "mistake". If you expect him to play as good as Tiger Woods (which ofcourse he cannot)and he doesn't ... it doesn't mean he just means that you've an unreasonable expectation from him... but..if you compare him with other tennis players-turned-to-golf he may not be all that bad. Now just assume for the sake of argument, that almost everyone playing golf today is from a previous tennis background...and Leander happens to win a lot of tournaments..(though he may not play the best golf) there is no incentive for him to spend time/resources or practice to raise his level of game tremendously though he has to constantly practice and everything. Remember that for these guys..time is money...and you just have to be better than the competition to win... today's cinema most actors are sons/daughters of yesteryear stars or model-turned actors/actresses and as i've said before majority of these ppl are not great at acting. only have to be as good as them to act in movies...which i think ash and other good looking actresses are. now..if u tell me that majority of actors in hindi movies cant act much..i can probably buy that argument much better than just saying that ppl like ash and few others are not good at acting. Also, the success rate of hindi movies have been very pathetic in the last few years and a lot of factors contribute to it like bad storyline etc. and I really doubt that today's audience is looking for great acting on screen as was the case in previous generations.

Yes...I did manage to shake her hands :-)......AND...:-) since I was standing near the exit of the place where I met she was leaving the place (there was a LOT of ppl and confusion there), I managed to touch her back as she was leaving the place and thanked her (u know how ppl touch ur shoulders/back and thank you).....AND...:-) you may not believe this(even I can't believe this even today) ...I have never done this to any girl...but ofcourse atleast you and I in this blog know that Ash is girl extraordinaire :-)... I just could not take my hands off her back...and as I could not walk with her beyond a certain point... my hand just slided her back..(since she was moving forward and I was not) and thru some divine act and coz of possible good deeds in previous deeds :-)my hand just fell on her b**t (now..dont you hate me for this....:-))...So, In response to ur question on whether I touched her hand....yes..i did touch her hand and much more...

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