Thursday, April 03, 2008

SuperStar

When you get a forwarded email and you frown and open it - sometimes you are surprised by the content. I have new regard for forwarded mails now. I have never laughed so much. It might be an old one but very funny coz I read it for the first time.

You want to know who is Rajanikanth....here are the facts


  • Rajanikanth makes onions cry

  • Rajanikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.

  • Ghosts are actually created when Rajanikanth kills people faster than Death can process them.

  • Rajanikanth can build a snowman..... out of rain.

  • Rajanikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.

  • Rajanikanth can drown a fish.

  • When Rajanikanth enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.

  • When Rajanikanth looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Rajanikanth and Rajanikanth.

  • Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Rajanikanth can throw Brett Favre even further.

  • The last digit of pi is Rajanikanth. He is the end of all things.

  • Rajanikanth does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.

  • Bullets dodge Rajanikanth.

  • A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Rajanikanth and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

  • Rajanikanth's calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajanikanth.

  • If you spell Rajanikanth wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Rajanikanth?" It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."

  • Rajanikanth can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

  • Once a cobra bit Rajanikanth' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

  • When Rajanikanth gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.

  • Rajanikanth can kill two stones with one bird.

  • Rajanikanth was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.

  • Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Rajanikanth can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.

  • There is no such thing as global warming. Rajanikanth was cold, so he turned the sun up.

  • Rajanikanth can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

  • Rajanikanth has a deep and abiding respect for human life… unless it gets in his way.

  • It takes Rajanikanth 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

  • Rajanikanth once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

  • In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajanikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.

  • Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajanikanth.

  • Rajanikanth destroyed the periodic table, because Rajanikanth only recognizes the element of surprise.

  • Rajanikanth got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.

  • With the rising cost of gasoline, Rajanikanth is beginning to worry about his drinking habit.

  • The square root of Rajanikanth is pain. Do not try to square Rajanikanth, the result is death.

  • When you say "no one's perfect", Rajanikanth takes this as a personal insult.

18 comments:

Lone Crusader said...

I have seen McGyver/Jack Bauer jokes with the same lines...they are seemingly interchangeable.

Babu said...

thank god its not our Super star "Rajni"..its some assole Raja-ni-kanth ;-)

Hawkeye said...

lonecrusader,

thanks. didnt know that.

babs,

ha ha! good catch.

Anonymous said...

This Rajanikanth sounds very homicidal.

Anonymous said...

And this is supposed to be funny. I have seen spam mails about viagra funnier than this.

Sankar said...

The grand-parent of all these is "Chuck Norris"

www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

And my personal favourite is :

Chuck Norris is the trailer and Rajni is the Movie.

Anonymous said...

babu got it. this is created by some north indian types with an intention to malign thalaivar. Where is I, the saviour of tamil nation. Is it not time to fast in front of valluvar kottam?

Naren's said...

this is funny?????....ennathu kappithanama paesikitu.......

Hawkeye said...

boys:

Dont over analyze. this is a post on fwded mail about rajAnikanth. reserve your super insults for a real post.

Anonymous said...

I is already fasting in front of Valluvar Kottam. I( not that I) just saw him there having a fanta.

maxdavinci said...

coincides with the fast going on, neat timing....

I received a similar email saying chuck norris facts, bunch of ppl made it into mithunda facts. This triggered some of his loyal fans and they blamed the usual suspects, southies. The favor was returned by creating balakrishna and ranjikanth facts.

Arun Sundar said...

In a similar forward, I also got this:

Rajni is the only person who can hit his own back by going around the world in a split second.

Sarang said...

Well, over-analyze or not, not everything in this post is funny. There are a few lines that are but the rest are plain average. As someone (anonymous) said: seems pretty homicidal.

Anonymous said...

Well, it's surprising that there is no post yet about the hogenakkal issue. I hope you are doing good.

Anonymous said...

If you want to laugh you asses off, have a look at this:

http://www.techsatish.net/tamil/gallery/main.php?g2_itemId=4417

Comedian Vatal Nagaraj

Edgar Dantas said...

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edgar dantas
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Anonymous said...

doesn't seems as funny.... I hate it..

Minkowsky revamped said...

and Rajnikanth is yet to read this post.. (u are still alive right ?? ;o) )

Minkowsky..